Hypothetically Speaking . . .

. . . . . . . . Because Humor Matters

Archive for the 'Uncategorized' Category

In Defense of Bacon and Eggs

People often ask why I don’t post more frequently. Well, if I can be honest, most of the time it’s because I’m folded up into a ball, clutching myself, hiding underneath my bed, trying not to pass out from the smell of old sneakers and snow boots that have been under there since at least […]

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Mam, I Swear It’s Not Herpes … Really!!!

One of the best things about having a blog is that you can vent about whatever you want, whenever you want, wherever you want. I guess a blog is kind of like a spouse except your blog won’t eventually divorce you for a younger, more updated model, or call you to ask you to delete […]

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In Memory Of Grandpa

During the writing of the blog entry that would have been posted sometime this week, my grandfather, Frank Harry Dorsey, passed away. I’m still kind of in denial about it. You know how there are older people in your life and you always expect them to be there because they always have been and you […]

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I Don’t Wanna Grow Up, And You Can’t Make Me!!!

I was sitting at a red light one morning when a gentleman and his little boy crossed the road. The man, who I assume to be the kid’s father, was holding the little boy’s hand as the boy skipped happily across the street. It was the cutest thing. Immediately I wanted to skip too. If […]

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Sometimes You Just Don’t Fit In

So, the other day I saw the most awesome suit on sale in the Sears catalog. I mean, it didn’t have exotic polka dots or rhinestones or anything, but still it was an amazing suit nonetheless. The kind that Denzel or Prince would wear to the Grammys or to McDonalds or something. I had planned […]

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Now That’s Just Disturbing

These days, you don’t have to search too hard to spot things, people or situations that are clearly disturbing. For example, take a look in the mirror. Find your butt. Now compare where it is currently to where it was three years ago—or even where it was last week. Disturbing, right? Oh, and what about […]

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A Few Things Every Man Should Know

There comes a time in every little boy’s life when he realizes that there are certain things he needs to know in order to become a man. For some, this realization comes shortly after birth. Others recognize it when they reach their teens. And as for the rest of us, we’re still waiting for that […]

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Unsigned, Unsealed, And Rejected

Due to my starting the new job in DC back in February, I’ve been searching high and low for a new apartment so that I can cut down on the commute from Baltimore. So far, I’ve seen almost every vacant apartment in the DC area. I’ve seen short ones. Tall ones. Big ones. And small […]

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When Life Hands You A New Job

Two weeks ago I started a new job. As you may know, new jobs can be kind of, sort of, just a tad bit stressful. First, there’s the not knowing anything, which is worsened because you don’t know anything, which is then magnified by the fact that you don’t know anything. And if you’re like […]

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Confessions Of A College Graduate

It’s official. On January 10th, 2010, after 7 long years, I finally walked across the stage of a partially accredited university whose phone number I’d found on the wall of a Burger King bathroom and was handed a rolled up map disguised as my degree, patted on the back, and sent out into the world […]

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