Hypothetically Speaking . . .

. . . . . . . . Because Humor Matters

Archive for the 'Humor Blog' Category

Filters and Fashion Nova Grandpas

OK, so the word is out. I’m officially 39. If you do the math, that means this time next year I’ll be 40. Wait…let me double check those numbers. Carry the 3. Add a 9. Subtract 5. Yup, 40. But let’s not get ahead of ourselves. 40 may be coming for me faster than Michael […]

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Jennifer Lopez, Ricky Martin and Magic Mike Birthday Wishes

As many of my two readers know, in a few weeks I will be having yet another birthday. This is disturbing for several reasons. First, I could’ve sworn I just had a birthday yesterday. Second, I’m inching closer and closer to learning what happens to people when they hit 40. Third, my metabolism is acting […]

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Of iPhones And Men

If you know anything about me, you know that I make a major life decision every September. Because I’m allegedly a responsible adult, I never take this decision lightly out of respect for the millions who have had to make this choice before me. You probably guessed it. It’s the decision of whether to get […]

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Goodbye Summer, Hello Dates!

It’s weird how we are in the first weeks of September, yet it feels like the end of something. Well, I guess it is the end of summer. Soon it will be the end of my day trips to the beach and the weather has already started to change. Kids are back in school, which […]

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Beach Bodies and Pant Suits

So, just like last year, I’ve been patiently waiting by the front door for the UPS guy to arrive with the 2018 beach body I ordered off Amazon. Of course, it’s late. Even with Prime’s 2-day shipping, it still has not been delivered. Whenever I try to track the package, the results read, “Don’t hold […]

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I’m a Professional . . . and I Mean It!!!

I’m not sure if you know this or not, but, allegedly, I’m a professional. Clearly, not as much of a professional as Martha Stewart, Steve Jobs, or Snooki even, but one can certainly dream. And you may not be able to tell my level of professionalism by the sporadic frequency of my blog posts, but […]

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Adulting Sucks!!!

A wise person on Pinterest once wrote, “Adulthood is like looking both ways before you cross the street and then getting hit by an airplane.” Because that’s just my luck, I can barely go three minutes without looking up into the sky to see what obstacles South West or United may be hurling my way. […]

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In Need of CPR and Bail Money

So, we are finally starting to experience some of the warmer weather that comes along with spring. Although I didn’t do as many push-ups as I had intended during the winter months, as soon as the temperature reached 70 degrees, I was the first person to rip off my shirt and my Spanx. Perhaps I […]

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In Defense of Bacon and Eggs

People often ask why I don’t post more frequently. Well, if I can be honest, most of the time it’s because I’m folded up into a ball, clutching myself, hiding underneath my bed, trying not to pass out from the smell of old sneakers and snow boots that have been under there since at least […]

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Lies, Deceit, and Treadmills

I’m not sure what you’ve heard about me on TMZ lately, but I would like to officially declare that I do not think everything is all about me. Contrary to what was reported on Entertainment Tonight, I do not take every situation and make it about myself. It is very unfortunate that my simple question […]

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